Literally Objectify Her

vintageinstepford:

You’re relaxing with the newspaper and she asks, “is there anything I can get you?”

You grin and reply, “a footstool would be great.”

She moves to retrieve the footrest and you correct her.  “No, no, honey.  You’re my footrest today.”

Order her to get down on her hands and knees and stay perfectly still while you put your feet up and continue to read.

Maybe it’ll take you an hour to finish the paper.  Maybe it’ll take longer.  That’s okay.  You’re comfortable and that’s all that matters.

And what about her?

Don’t worry about her.  She’s just a girl.

-VIS